Please cancel my interview today at 3 with Erica. I have found other employment. Sort of. Mostly I am canceling because of that stupid e-mail reminder you keep sending every single day which is incredibly annoying and makes me feel like you guys are my mother. (My mom is so much better than a temp agency though so that’s not fair. I love her; she’s great.) Anyway, thank you for making me feel guilty about my mother. Stop sending those to people. Unless you want to seem like an overbearing matron. In which case you should keep going. But go a little further and ask in the automated emails if I have met any nice girls, or ask how I’m surviving if I don’t have any money. Am I living on my credit card? Mom, I love you, but please relax. I’m fine. I’ve got one of those low introductory rates! I’ve got issues about feeling infantilized, yes. It’s not just you guys and your automated e-mail appt. reminder.
Perhaps, you’re thinking "This is just an automatic thing. It’s not a big deal. Andy, you’re overreacting.” Well, you’re right. I’m probably a little too much of a silly heart to work in an office at this point anyway. Also, I just realized I don’t have a suit out here and I don’t want to call home and have my parents send the only suit I have which is the one I wore to my brother’s funeral. Sorry this got dark. Sorry, not sorry. I’d rather wear that suit than a pair of Dockers that don’t fit me which I would buy an hour before the interview along with some shoes from Payless which reminds me of the stupid snakeskin boat shoes I wore from there in Junior High.
I don’t want to temp anymore. I have two graduate degrees and my ego simply can’t bear a $12/hr paycheck again. Anyway, to wrap up: My life is in a complete financial tailspin, but my standup comedy is actually going pretty good. I’ll be at No Fun Bar on Ludlow street tonight at 8:30. UG Comedy Show.